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How Can I Give the Grace I Give Others to Myself as Well?

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Update: Listen as Dr. Shannan Crawford teaches “How can I give the grace give others to myself as well.” This is a very important concept that will empower you to live your best life.

I am so overwhelmed by the love Jesus shows me in granting me forgiveness, love and mercy from the Lord and Savior in whom I believe. Not because of my good works, only because of His mercy.  I praise Him and thank Him regularly, because the longer I live the more I see that it has to be grace that saves us sinners. So, it’s all God.
Thank you, Jesus. So how can I give the grace I give others to myself as well?

Today we will be discussing:

  1. How Can I Give the Grace I Give to Others Myself as Well?
  2. How can I learn to chill and give myself a break?
  3. How do you overcome perfectionism?
  4. How can I be successful and still find time for a joyful life filled with grace?
  5. What are some good ways to take some down time?
  6. How to make today a great day no matter what

But, hey – I need some grace from me!  

How can I learn to chill and give myself grace?

I need some grace from myself.  This AAA type personality demands so much of herself – way more than family, friends and even God do!Have you ever felt you should try to do everything perfectly? As a student, you needed best grades, most friends, make A team in basketball (although far from a natural athlete), needed to excel in everything. 

I don’t even know just where that came from – and I am not interested in finding the cause – I just want to quit carrying that over into every area of my life. Did I just hear myself say that?

What about you?

So, you’ve been there?  Are you there now?  You were an excellent student, landed a great job, met handsome husband, tried to keep a perfect house while raising three perfect children and all the while maintaining a trim and attractive figure? 

And you say – “Yes, that was me. And I succeeded!”

Grace vs perfectionism

Good for you!  And are you still expecting perfectionism from yourself while showing grace and acceptance to everyone else? 

  • Do you finish the tasks that others leave? Do you do the dishes and tidy the house while everyone else repeatedly heads for their den? 
  • Do you check and correct your work team’s individual projects to avoid problems for them – and you? 
  • And when anything goes wrong, if a family member misses a deadline, or hubby has no ironed shirt, if the kids don’t have their homework, and the dog has fleas – well, of course, it is your fault! You shoulda! 

Have I got good news for you!  You can learn to give yourself GRACE!

  • Jesus loves you as you are and grants you grace so that you can grow in love and good works.  
  • You give yourself no grace, and deride yourself because you slipped and weren’t perfect yesterday. It ruined your evening and you can’t shake it off today. 
  • You look in the mirror and you see bags under the eyes and shudder at the tummy.  And you inwardly blast yourself because you fail to consistently work out and can’t seem to manage adequate sleep.  You are a failure, you can’t do it, and you say you are falling apart.

You must learn to give yourself Grace!  You give it to others. 

How would that look? How can I give the grace I give others to myself as well?

7:00 – Coffee and ten minutes alone with God and your Bible.  May have to sneak into the garage or out on patio. Absorb His love for you and listen to Him say “You can do all things through me – I’ve gotcha. Let me carry the load today. I love you just the way you are.”

8:00 – Look in mirror, smile and say, “Good Morning, Beautiful. Have a wonderful day!”

8:30 – “Grab the backpacks that YOU KIDS packed last night and Dad will drop you by school today.”

9:00 – “Good Morning Team. Let’s get it going. We will not be pulling overtimes for projects.  In fact, hit it early and we will ALL plan to leave twenty minutes early each day. If you can’t manage your workload, please let me know by noon.”

You get the idea. Take charge of your life. Quit feeling like everyone is walking all over you. And quit carrying the load for everyone who is able to do their own. 

Give yourself some grace. 

Rid yourself of the voice in your head that says:

  • See, you can’t do this.  
  • You made another mess.  
  • No one really likes you. 
  • You are going to be alone the rest of your life.  
  • And you look old and drab, by the way.”  

Look at yourself like God looks at you: 

  • You are the Daughter of the King. 
  • You are beloved. 
  • You belong to me.”
  • You have a partner in Jesus to lead, forgive and carry your load.  He is waiting for you to give it to Him. He has a plan for you.
  • And He doesn’t make junk –  remember that – you can be who He has called you to be. 

How can I be successful and still find time for a joyful life filled with grace?

  • The diapers are going to run short, the dirty dishes are still going to stack up. 
  • Someone else is going to win first place. 
  • Some other husband got the raise. 

Hey – God knows that. And he says, “I have come that you may have life and have it more abundantly.”  

  • Do you think perhaps you need to step back and see if your idea of success is the same as His? 
  • Have you lost the joy in serving? The joy in praise? Are you not appreciated? Are you bone tired? 
  • Those dishes must be washed, those diapers changed, those goals at home and work must be met – and you must make that hair appointment!  

Yes, I understand schedules and pressure. And you are going to make it. But may I suggest that you give yourself some grace along the way? 

What are some good ways to take some down time?

  1. Be kind to yourself. Schedule a long hot bath. Ask that a birthday gift be a gift for a massage rather than free burgers at the drive in. 
  2. .Change your inner tape to this: “Good job, Babe!”  “Ten-minute nap with feet up, Sweetheart.”  “Someday they will remember to thank me for this (with a smile.) Today I will extend grace and not feel unappreciated.” “Thanks for loving me, Jesus. And for forgiving my ugly thoughts a bit ago. I want you to keep helping me become the woman you made me to be. I want to learn how to have time with you.” “Thank you for loving me like I am and encouraging me on.”
  3. Set some guidelines and let family and staff know some of them. Then, gently remind them that your time is important.
  4. Share with them that you have been robbed of the time that God intends for your daily restoration. 
  5. Protect downtime.  Your family will discover a scintillating, loving and fun woman resides in that body that had seemed so mechanized.
  6. Continue to extend grace to others. Just don’t let them drain you of all your time and spontaneity.
  7. Include family and work partners in projects that portray grace to others. 
  8. Teach them the joy of giving without expecting anything in return. Teach them to help teach others to help themselves.
  9. Set goals.  Don’t set yours at Perfection. 
  10. Remember, you must give yourself a little grace. 

Results:  Less frustration and burnout.  Joy all around.

Amazing Grace – Amazing you!

How to make today a great day full of grace

Mind over matter has been my mantra. If you get up and think you may be “sick today”:

  • First make yourself a cup of coffee. 
  • Then make your bed – an essential element in this plan. 
  • Still feel lousy? Take a shower.
  • Freshen kitchen. 
  • Still feel lousy? Then go back to bed. You really must be sick.  

“What?  And mess up my bed?  I think I am going to be ok after all.”

  • Glance in the mirror, give yourself a big hug and remark:  “What an amazing woman you are!” You will be echoing your Lord.
  • God made you perfect – a perfect gift to all of us. 
  • Accept who you are. 
  • Develop yourself in every area to the best of your ability. 
  • Serve the Lord and His children.
  • Follow the example of Jesus in drawing away for quiet time and time with the Heavenly Father.
  •  Walk a lot! Yes, Jesus did!
  • Eat fish.
  • Be kind.”

You are truly an amazing woman!  Now go extend grace to the rest of us! 

If you would like to have a relationship with Jesus Christ, we invite you watch the video below and then connect with people in your area who can help you grow.

We invite you to watch the “Great News” video on this page and find out more about God’s love for you and how you can receive forgiveness and eternal life – today!

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The Prayer of Salvation

Jesus, I don't know You, and I don't know what Your plan is for me. But thank you for coming to die in my place. I'm sorry for anything I've ever done wrong in my life. I don't understand how You could ever forgive me, but if You really would, I would like to accept your free gift of grace and complete forgiveness. Please come into my life and take control, and help me trust You. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

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